Becoming One with the Curls

Ultimate FAIL. I'm currently sitting in la biblioteca de la facultad but unfortunately can't get wifi.I was able to connect to the UChile server....yet it's saying not accessable..argh. I can't figure it out. If it wasn't completely obvious that I wasn't Chilean I'd have a little more courage to go ask the little old lady working behind the desk. Maybe one of my companeros will walk in... I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

In the meantime I shall listen to itunes and just post this later ( accompanied by boredom pics while at la facultad)

While I was drying my hair at 7 am and watching my curls become bigger...and bigger...I began thinking,one must embrace the curls. Now before you think this entry is going to be about how I've tamed my hair...just hear me out...I've actually got a point . When I was a toddler my hair was liso, straight and smooth. Impossible to believe? I was born with nearly black ,straight, frizzless hair. Later on things changed, first came the frizz and then the curls began to appear. The curls began coming in when I was about 8....it wouldnt take a good 6 years til my mother and I accepted this and another 6 until I began finding ways to tame it. During those 12 years I let everyone tell me what to do with my hair. Whether it was my mother brushing through my hair every morning, myself brushing in between every class period ( because I wanted to desperately be part of the blonde haired-perfect girl- group) , taking it personaly when I was made fun of for my mane ,or putting as much product as possible because thats what hairdressers told me...I had no way of understanding the beast upon my head. Luckily I figured out ways by myself to fix it and for the first time ever, this morning I looked in the mirror and thought, "hey....they can actually come off pretty ..sometimes."

To appreciate things we need to come to conclusions by ourselves. People do what they think is right by giving advice, helping, but it isnt until we come to a conclusion on our that we can fully appreciate whatever we had a problem with in the first time. This may take years, even after a personal decision is made, it's just hard for those who have "gone through it" to remember that it is your mind, not theirs. We all have this urge to protect others, constantly saying that they shouldnt do this or that, but how do we expect the recipient to ever learn for themselves? We're a generation stuck between independence and spoiled. We're coddled in many ways, see this, and then blame our parents for trying to control us....while at the same time we're criticizing this new generation for thier naivety and lack of culture. I read an article a couple years back concerning freshmen move in day. This mother was telling the story of how when she moved in her son, her and her husband stayed with him all day helping him find his way around campus and settle in. This reminded me of when I moved into Johnson.....I was grateful for the fact that my father walked all the way to Ukrops on Harrison and West Grace ( yea...it used to seem like it was miles away/ doesn't exist anymore) to find me random "necessities" for my room...but I was also internally screaming because I was ready to settle in..alone. I've always tried to value that we learn things on our own. This "new generation"( whether they will admit to it or not ) of college kids, the disney generation, were protected so much and influenced by an uncertain society that they see things from the surface, they haven't had time to explore thier subconcious. I try to remind myself when I get frustrated with "the youngins" it's just because they need to mature, they need to learn, experience. Of course I'm not taking myself out of this equation, we're all constantly learning and with each generation we're becoming more and more acceptable to procrastinating reality and adulthood. Yet , no matter what generation,when we get frustrated, upset, and angry we need to take a second, sit back, and reflect on whats going on, analyze it.

But there also has to be an understanding on the other end. Remember that with anger blunt sentiments will be expressed and should be taken with a grain of salt.A devil's advocate persay. If you know me well enough then you know I have a hot temper.Luckily only a handful has seen this side of me and they've only witnessed maybe an ounce of my wrath. My parents unfortunately get the blunt of this, catching all the hurtful things my mind can produce as quickly as my mouth can spurt 'em. Whenever a problem would come up in the frat I'd bring up this concept. Ranting is raw emotion and many times what comes out shouldnt be taken personally. We all need to rant, if you feel a volcano building within you there's no way it wont explode. Yet..heed ranter ( hehe....*hint hint* to those who MAY have caught on to that pun) becareful who you trust with your rant for you only have one true advocate and friend to rant to, yourself.

Now think about this one. What have you had to learn on your own? Did it feel worthwhile once this epiphany was reached? We learn about ourselves everday, is it ok to change once you've realized you've been doing something so wrong for so long?