...until the sky falls down on me

I'm the person you run to when you need advice.

The listener.
The Advice Giver.
The friend.

I've accepted this. But you'll never understand why I am who I am.

You'll never understand why I let him clog my brain.
You'll never understand why I allow the other to use me in such a way.
But most important, to the person reading, to the person listening, and most of all , the third person in this idea.You'll never know that I loved you.

You'll never know how I miss what we once were. But mistakes cause friendships to die. The hurricane became catastrophic.The hidden essence of disaster will never fade, yet you'll be that one person that will always make laugh with the same ease you've made me cry.

Perhaps this is why I allow the second subject to exist. You,The emotional ghost that tortures me with your icey protection.

And why I need you , the person I heal yet in your own way knows that you're also my healer. A bit dramatic but my hero, as much as she's my heroine.

I know it's all confusing, but it's meant to be that way. To me, a relationship consists of 3 things: friendship,lust,and love. Perhaps I can be considered lucky that You  make up this trio, yet you is a separation.

Until the composition is complete, until the 3 themes create one, confusion will just have to exist .

But I have my motives. I'm secure in what I understand.